Topic: TWO COWS ( Part 1) @枫下论坛 The Rolia Forum

工作学习 / IT杂谈 / TWO COWS ( Part 1) -netwind(网风); 2001-8-21 {322} (#175122@0)
TWO COWS ( Part 1)

PURE COMMUNISM: You have two cows. Your neighbors help you take
care of them, and you all share the milk.

APPLIED COMMUNISM: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk.

DICTATORSHIP: You have two cows. The government takes both and shoots you.

TWO COWS ( Part 2) -netwind(网风); 2001-8-21 {1922} (#175125@0)
本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull, which you
use to breed. Then you create a great website and start offering to
export sperm from the bull to anyone and everyone, especially emerging
markets over the Internet.
After a few weeks, your company completes its IPO on NASDAQ, and a
few brokerage firms start coverage with a strong buy rating for this
wonderful new Internet stock. Your stock zooms from the $0.10 per
share initial offering price to $110, when you sell. The stock plummets
back to $0.10 a few months later when the dopes who bought it realize
that your business has no earnings and never will, despite the Internet
connection.
Several law firms and the SEC bring various civil and criminal actions
against the company, all of the officers and directors, and (of course)
you under various fraud theories. You quickly settle the civil cases
so the lawyers get paid, but you still have plenty stashed away. You
plead nolo in the SEC case, and you are sentenced to 10 years in prison,
of which you actually serve seven weeks. When you come out, you can't
resist the temptation to buy two chickens. Then...

HONG KONG CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell three of them to
your publicly-listed company, using letters of credit opened by your
brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an
associated general offer so that you can get all four cows back, with
a tax deduction for keeping five cows. The milk rights of six cows
are then transferred via a Panamanian intermediary to a Cayman Islands
company secretly owned by the majority shareholder, who sells the
rights to all seven cows milk back to the listed company and proceeds
from the sales are deferred. The annual report says that the company
owns eight cows, with an option on one more. Meanwhile, you kill the
two cows because of the bad feng shui.更多精彩文章及讨论，请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net

TWO COWS ( Part 3) -netwind(网风); 2001-8-21 {1359} (#175130@0)
本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛TWO COWS ( Part 3)

TRUE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk.

REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors vote for someone to tell you who gets the milk.

AMERICAN DEMOCRACY: The government promises to give you two cows if you vote for it. After the election, the president is impeached for
speculating in cow futures. The press dubs the affair "Cowgate."

BRITISH DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. You feed them sheep's brains and they go mad. The government does nothing.

SINGAPOREAN DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. The government fines you for illegally keeping two unlicensed farm animals in an apartment.

BUREAUCRACY: You have two cows. At first, the government regulates
what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you
not to milk them. After that, it takes both, shoots one, milks the
other, and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to
fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.

TOTALITARIANISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and
denies they ever existed. Milk is banned.

POLITICAL CORRECTNESS: You are associated with (the concept of
"ownership" is a symbol of the phallo-centric, war-mongerish,
intolerant past) two differently aged (but no less valuable to
society) bovines of non-specified gender.更多精彩文章及讨论，请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net

Politics is so ugly that everyone spits on it and bemocks it. But you just cannot find a place without it. -birdincage(birdincage); 2001-8-22 (#175784@0)

you are right. there is no perfect world for us. -netwind(网风); 2001-8-22 (#175796@0)