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  • 相约北美 / 移民留学 / Rollor,Slimpig, Hearts and other DXs: I've just finished an interview. My friend reminded me of thanking letter. Would you please review my thanking letter and critique it?
    Dear XXX,

    Thank you and Joan for your time and effort spent in interviewing me in Monday (Nov.26) afternoon. I am deeply impressed by your broad knowledge in health and safety and your company’s accident prevention program.

    As you can see from my resume, I finished my contract with XXX in last September. I would like pursue my career in occupational health and safety, though XXX will probably call me if it recruits full time production personnel. You noticed as well that I started my career in health and safety when I joined American oriented company – XXX in 1992. The company sent me to Norway half a year for an intensive health, safety and quality training program including classroom courses and on job practices.

    I am looking forward to hearing from you when a decision is made.
    • Dear XXX
      Dear XXX:

      I would like to say thanks to you and Mr. Last name Joan for your time and effort spent with me in the interview on Monday, Novenber 26. I am very impressed by your extensive knowledge in health and safety (perhaps consider to say something like health sector or something like banking industry). Also, I am pleased to learn your accident prevention program.

      As you can recall from my resume, I successfully completed my contract with XXX last September. I would like to pursue my career further in occupational health and safety industry. Please note that I have gained broard knowledge and experience during my last 9 years working in this industry. I also had an opportunity to explore Norway's health, and safety through a company training program...... continue bullshitting.....

      I believe I am fully qualified for this position. And your consideration is fully appreciated. I am looking forward to hearing from you. blah blah blah.
      • 写完了才发现很多语句不通,唉,自从读CS以来,连英语BS都退步了。
      • Thank you for your time and critique!
      • Great.
    • 1,注意格式(双方详细地址、日期、Dear Mr. XXX:、及结尾的SINCERELY,和签名)。2, 分别发送给两人(不要写you and joan),不要一起发(应在24H以内发)。3,三段落,但要再短些.4, more xxx?
      • 格式
        thank-you letter:

        ---Return address
        ---
        ---Date
        ---
        ---Company Address
        ---
        ---Dear Mr. XONG:
        ---
        ---P1) Thanks for interview. What job?
        ---
        ---P2) Review skills(add more if necessary)
        ---
        ---P3) Contact #. Opportunity. Available.
        ---
        ---Sincerely,
        ---
        ---
        ---signature
        ---
        ---your name print here.
        • Great format for thank-you-letter! Thank you very much.
      • Thanks for your great comments! I should have mailed them seperately. However, I only know the second guy's first name.
        • use "Dear (first_name): is ok. BTW, a colon followed is better.if you write to your friends, you could use comma.
    • 抱歉,回晚了。我个人认为,感谢信就是一个礼节性的信件。简明扼要,第一感谢对方提供机会和时间来面试你,第二再次表示对对方的公司感兴趣,第三希望得到offer。
      我这里有一封以前写的感谢信,供参考。有一点请记住,不要过多地concern你的英语语法问题,最主要的是把想表达的意思说出来。现在回过头来看,我原来申请工作的简历和cover letter等,有很多小的错误。但是他们雇你主要是看中你的长处,英语到可以交流的地步就可以了。

      XXXXX
      0000 00AVE N.W.
      Calgary AB T2K 0S7
      June 14, 2000

      Mr. XXXX
      Vice President
      XXX Engineering Ltd.
      0000,0000 AVE S.W.
      Calgary, AB

      Dear Mr. XXX,

      It was a great pleasure meeting with you this morning. Thank you for the opportunity to interview me.

      I was pleased with what I learnt about XXX Engineering, especially your current and potential projects, to which my past experience as a process engineer might be contributing.

      I am excited about the possibility of working with you. Hopefully, I would be granted a position on your twelfth floor.

      Sincerely yours,


      XXXX
      • "Sincerely yours, " should be"Sincerely, or "Yours," never put two words together.
        • Why not?
          • custom!
            • I think you should use them together too.
        • Why, I think we should use them together.
      • Thank you very much for your thoughtful advise and damn good sample! By the way, do you think "can contribute" more certain than "might be contributing"?
        • 用CAN不能用MIGHT. 这时候还不肯定等啥时候? 如果你是EMPLOYER, 你愿意HIRE一个CAN的, 还是MIGHT的? 嘻嘻
          • How about "could"?
            • I think "can" is better, more assertive
    • 看看对你是否有用? #57192
      • Thank you! I've learned something new from your previous post - mention one or two selling points you forgot to say during interview.
    • 评论
      本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛Dear XXX,

      Thank you and Joan for your time and effort spent in interviewing me in Monday (Nov.26) afternoon. 不要用括号。I am deeply impressed by your broad knowledge in health and safety and your company’s accident prevention program. 拍马屁对路。 表达可以再提高。

      As you can see from my resume, I finished my contract with XXX in last September. I would like pursue my career in occupational health and safety, though XXX will probably call me if it recruits full time production personnel. You noticed as well that I started my career in health and safety when I joined American oriented company – XXX in 1992. The company sent me to Norway half a year for an intensive health, safety and quality training program including classroom courses and on job practices. 重复简历不能加强人家对你的印象。

      I am looking forward to hearing from you when a decision is made 表达不对。 并且暗示对方在决定做出之前, 你可能并不想与之交谈。

      ============ 总论=========
      1.不是专业的跟踪信。建议读Knock'em Dead十遍.

      2.跟踪信的主题是:他永远是对的。回想他说的, 在此肯定。并借机表达那些你的简历, 和你在面世中没有提到的你的强项, 而那些强项是你刚通过面试发现是对方公司正苦苦寻找的。

      3。注意: 任何时候, 重复不能加强你的意思, 重复暗示对方拿你的话不当回事, 因此有必要再说一遍。

      4。信发出之前, 找人改英文。更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
      • Thanks you very much for your pertinent comments!