来自中国安徽的大陆移民安钢因车祸遭遇不幸。安钢先生的追思活动拟于2007年2月24日 (星期六) 下午1时至3时在R.S. Kane 殡仪馆举行，敬请安钢生前的同学、同乡、同事、好友及各界人士前往参加，为安钢先生送别。R.S. Kane 殡仪馆具体地址为: 6150 Yonge St，North York，ON M2M 3W9。

根据其亲属意愿，安钢的骨灰在追思活动之后将被送回中国安徽省，并在当地举行追悼会及骨灰安葬仪式。安钢的亲属希望借此机会，向本地媒体及关心和帮助他的各界人士表示衷心感谢。

作为一个海外单身男人确实有许多无奈, 要想在本地找一个本份女人过日子实在很难 ,试问有多少单身女人没有跟鬼子睡过? 说实话很少,又有谁愿意接受一个被鬼子睡过并拋弃的女 人 ,许多女人一到这里就失去了自我,不知自已是什么了. 转了一圈又重新回来找华人, 这样的女人谁愿意要. 回国找一个实在是一个无奈的选择.
安钢的错就在于对女人太相信, 太相信她们的甜言密语, 没有让她在国内生完孩子, 孩子是女人的绊脚石, 这一点他不了解, 如果一个女人不愿要孩子，说明她就不诚心跟你，只是把你当跳板，这样的女人你就没必要对她负责，扔在国内啦倒。这一点很值得想回国找好老婆的人借鉴。
我见过不少三十多岁因家庭团聚来加的女人，她们一来就觉得到了自由王国，一切都可以随心所欲了，对担保人的态度马上就发生了变化，分居离婚当然也就随之而来，受伤害的自然是担保人，到头来落个人财两空，还多了一次婚姻记录，为下一次结婚带来隐患。
所以本人在此衷告各位想回国结婚或已经结婚还没有团聚的同胞们，没有小孩千万不能办团聚，不要指望女人会良心发现，只要你不向加国政府声明已婚，你始终是单身，你始终是自由人。
一个女人三十多岁不愿生孩子，可靠吗？

本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛it seems that whenever a tragic event occurs our community tend to launch a witch-hunt for a scapegoat. and that scapegoat most time happens to be the spouse of the deceased.
the whole discussion about this event is dominated by a certain kind of "victim mentality". we assume the widow was deceitful and she got to be the cause of the tragedy. We assume the deceased was victimized by the widow and the unhappy marriage. and this assumption became the foundation of our demand for justice to be done.
we should probably ask ourselves a few questions before jumping on the bandwagon for witch-hunt:
1. do we have enough respect for a man's wisdom and judgment? if we do then on what basis can we assume we are so much more clever than the deceased that we can see througth something he could not fathom?
2. do we have enough respect for a man's right of choice and dignity of free will? if we do then on what basis can we assume the deceased was led into a trap and buried by his own emotional blindness?
3. do we have enough respect for a human being's pursuit of happiness? if we do then on what basis can we blame the widow for leaving the deceased -- even if they only married a few months?
4. do we really always need someone to blame for the tragedies happened in our life? we choose the way we live and we choose the kind of creature we want to be. we should not "victimize" ourselves in order to blame others for the choice we made and the consequence we are going to suffer.
5. do we have the courage to face the fact that each of us has his/her own fate -- something that is "beyond my control" in most cases? if we do then we can look at the tragedies from a more Stoic perspective. or like Nietzsche said long time ago "Amor Fati" -- love of fate.

we should give the deceased enough respect and leave him in peace. he made his choice. he lived his life the way he wanted.更多精彩文章及讨论，请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net

可恨!!最好将她的相貌公布于众,以免他人受害

本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛From: jnash(加拿大生活) To: cnca70 Reply Mark this message
Sent: 2007-02-13 19:32 (EST)
True Love
We humans are emotional beings. And our emotions are generally divided into two categories: positive and negative. Love is an outstanding type of positive emotion, and, in its extreme form, there is true love.
If you look up the word love in The American Heritage Dictionary, you’ll find quite a few definitions about love: “A deep, tender, ineffable feeling of affection and solicitude toward a person”, “A feeling of intense desire and attraction toward a person,” or “An intense emotional attachment, as for a pet or treasured object”. While love in general is a positive feeling for anything that pleases us, true love is an intense, warm, healthy and happy feeling only for our peer humans. It is full of affection, devotion and appreciation, all for the sake of love and love only. It is not there to exchange for dependence, intrusion or a superior feeling over others.
True love is first expressed in the form of affection, that is, caring, nurturing, and supporting. The affection is there for no reasons or purposes, only for love. Though an equal affection from the loved ones is also welcome, true love never counts on it in the first place. The best example is the affection parents have for kids. When the kids are young, the parents give all their earthly affection by providing everything the kids need: food and clothes, toys and trips, good manners and college education, etc., etc. Before the kids are independent, the parents never stop caring, nurturing, or supporting. In fact, a majority of parents continue to show their affection even though their offspring are out there in the society. However, they never count on it that some day they will depend on their children, poor or rich, failure or success. They know the affection they render never secures them of the dependence on their children. But they just keep doing it. The reason is simple: behind the affection, there is a true love, not a trade for dependence.
Just as affection is not there to trade for dependence, true love in its next form of devotion does not pay the right to intrude on others either. In other words, devotion of true love means only a determination of offering, contributing and sacrificing to others. And true love does not necessarily assume that the devotion must be accepted, nor does it allow a single step further against the will of others. No matter how devoted, true love never finds the least excuse to force on others. For instance, Joe practiced his devotion to Laura in his own way. He tried everything he could think of, but a year later Laura said goodbye to him. She said she did not like the way he sometimes acted. Now and then, he brought her some daily necessities in spite of her thankful refusal many a time. Other times, he decided to take her out for a dinner or a movie without checking with her about the time. He just came to fetch her. Thus, it is apparent that Joe lost Laura because he was breaking the law of true love. True love is devoted but cannot be mixed with intruding.
If devotion is there to initiate affections for others, then appreciation in true love always strives to pay it back. By appreciation, true love not only shows respect, admiration and esteem for others, but also presents gratitude and acknowledgment to each other in the same time. For sure, true love is not there to gain a superior feeling or control over others. Instead, there is always a reciprocal thankfulness and gratitude between the loving and loved. True love is shared between equal peers. For instance, decade-long old friends exchange gifts or visit each other occasionally. Whatever is exchanged or done diplomatically, the real emotion behind is a mere appreciation of each other. They both enjoy equal importance and respect. No one is superior or inferior; no one is controlling or controlled. In contrast, charity cannot be deemed as true love because donors exchange their money or possessions for a superior feeling or control over the poor whereas relief receivers trade their sympathy for food or clothes. They are by no means equal, and they do not share earnest appreciation for each other at all. Charity is a kind of love but not true love.
In conclusion, true love is the kind of love that is soaked with a whole-hearted unselfish affection for others, supported by a long lasting devotion to others, and that is reacted upon in a reciprocal appreciation. It is the purest, most intense, and complete of all positive emotions. It is precious because it is not easy or simple to love in that way. Sometimes, true love even takes real, real pain.更多精彩文章及讨论，请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net