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This couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very
much in love, couldn't wait to go out into town and party with his old
buddies, so he says to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back..."
"Where are you going coochy cooh...?" asked the wife.
"I'm going to the bar, pretty face. I'm going to have a beer."
The wife says to him, "You want a beer my love?" Then she opens the
door to the refrigerator and shows him 25 different kinds of beer brands
different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.
The husband doesn't know what to do, and the only thing that he can
think of saying is, "Yes, loolie loolie...but the bar.... you know...the
He didn't get to finish the sentence, when the wife interrupts him by
saying, "You want a frozen glass puppy face?" She takes a huge beer mug
out of the freezer so frozen that she was getting chills holding it. The
husband, looking a bit pale, says, "Yes, tootsie roll, but at the bar
they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't be long.
I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"
"You want hors d'oeuvres poochi pooh?"
She opens the oven and takes out 15 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres:
chicken wings, pigs in a blanket, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.
"But sweet honey...at the bar...you know...the swearing, thedirty words and
"You want dirty words cutie pie?...
HERE, DRINK YOUR FUCKING BEER IN YOUR
FROZEN FUCKING MUG AND EAT YOUR FUCKING SNACKS, BECAUSE YOU AREN'T GOING
ANYWHERE! GOT IT ASSHOLE?!!"
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