basically you wrote a good essay and listed out your opinions in good order. but contents seems a bit loose. TWE is testing whether you have the ability to develop your opinions - speak out your opinion and use reasons / facts etc. to support it. for example, you mentioned location is related with education but you didn't develop your opinion there.
if you don't have good typing skills so that you can write 400-500 words in 30mins, i would suggest you limit your body paragraph to max 3. make sure of developing each paragraph sufficiently and try to use more written english words but not too colloquial.
the above is only for your reference. my english is not so good so my posting may full of errors. i am trying to write more in english to improve myself. thank you for taking your time to read it.
if you don't have good typing skills so that you can write 400-500 words in 30mins, i would suggest you limit your body paragraph to max 3. make sure of developing each paragraph sufficiently and try to use more written english words but not too colloquial.
the above is only for your reference. my english is not so good so my posting may full of errors. i am trying to write more in english to improve myself. thank you for taking your time to read it.