My "Nightmare" -- smart and warm-hearted advices are in need. Thanks.

ybaby (茉莉花)

I had a horrible working experience in 2007, and it is still haunting me. Now I become doubt about what are real Canadian working culture and values? Or are they just cultural shocks for me as an individual?

With an accounting degree in a local university and an excellent reference from my 1- year contract work in a reputable bank, I got a job as a FA in a company. As a new hire, I had no experience in fund accounting. But after 1.5 days “training”, I was put to work. For the first month, I stayed there from 9 a.m. to 9 p.m., just waiting for someone to show me the working routine. A senior FA, who was in charge of our group, was picky on me from the very first day. After three months, she emailed me a piece of work instruction and asked me to follow it. I followed her instructions and made an error which was caught by the male manager. In order to explain the problem, I forwarded the senior FA’s instructional email to the manager. After that, the senior FA started to spread rumors about the male manager and me. She even rumored that I tried to take advantage from work by having affair with him. In fact, during the 20 months working for the company, I had only three conversations with the male manager including a greeting as a new hire, a performance review, and a group transfer introduction, all talks were in public and with a third person in presence. I did not have any personal contacts with him.

I always believed that “The facts speak for themselves”. So I ignored those rumors. But even without any evidence, the rumors spread widely. As the senior FA didn’t get any punishment, more rumors were spread behind me. A very short black junior FA rumored that I had diabetes. In fact, my whole family is very healthy and has NO diabetes at all. -- My family doctor can prove it!

After the male manager built love relationship with a Junior FA in our company, I thought “facts finally talk for themselves.” But I was wrong as the rumor became that I was “dumped by the male manager because “I was inferior to his real Fiance”!

I was laid off after working there for 20 months when the company restructured. I got a job in another fund company. But I didn’t have a new start because those rumors and disgusting lies started in the previous company continued working and even loudly with my absences. My name became a background of a “fake” loving affair, and those irresponsible lies made my working environment toxic and depressed. I even got miscarriage in the heavily toxic environment for my first child in May, 2009.

Understanding that life is not easy for immigrants, I went back to my home, and kept silent. I started to read and think about what is Canadian working culture and value. My family strongly supports me as they always do, they told me to forget about that unhappy experience and move on. But I doubt that are those rumors ended or getting worse? And the root of my disaster is the “fake loving affair with the white manager”, who is in the first mutual fund company. I don’t understand why the male manager did not respond with facts! It is super easy to break those rumors: evidence, evidence and evidence! – Ask those who spreading rumors: when, where and how did the affair happen, and support their words with evidence!

What should I do to protect my reputation? What should I do to prevent harm from the disaster in future? I can strength my body by riding and running marathons, but I don’t know how to deal with the stupid and crazy slanders? Is it safe to live like a giraffe in Canada?


2014-10-1 -05:00
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